In the summer of 2011, at the age of 21 years old, I found out I was pregnant with my first child. I remember being in the doctor’s office and the nurse saying Congratulations; you’re pregnant. I immediately began to cry and couldn’t stop thinking how. Well, we all know how it happened but, I was more so in shock like why me? Why now? I took plan B how could this be happening. I started freaking out and thinking how in the world am I going to be able to feed and provide for another human when I can barely feed and provide for myself. I was terrified to tell my parents. Here I was only 21 years old; in college had hardly been able to afford my rent with a roommate. At one point, I had even scheduled an appointment and thought abortion was the best way to go. Yes, abortion but, looking back on the decisions I’ve made, I’m so happy that I did not abort my child.
I ended up telling my parents and, of course, my mother somehow already known. I guess it was a mother’s intuition or something. So, in the summer of 2011, I decided to continue my pregnancy and continue to finish college. I had my baby on March 3, 2012, at 22 years old, and I never looked back. It wasn’t easy at times, and having a child made me more mature in a lot of areas in life. I no longer had a lot of time for friends and to go to college parties. For the first three years of my son’s life, I had to focus on school and motherhood. Looking back, I’m always amazed at how I was able to do it on my own. Granted, I had the help of my parents as well as my sons, other grandparents. At the time, I was a single mother; I had my apartment working full time at the University of Phoenix and trying to finish college. When my son’s father came back from college, we did the whole joint custody thing. Doing a joint custody agreement was probably the hardest of everything. Of course, I knew my son was safe, and his dad loved him, but that was my baby. I carried him for nine months and then woke up with, fed him, changed him, and took him to the doctors, Up until this point, my whole life had been rearranged to meet his needs and to have to even think about my son sleeping in another bed or home besides mine was strange. Eventually, I got used to the joint custody thing, and by the time we had gotten used to it, we had worked out our relationship and had moved in together. It’s funny looking back on my years of being a single mother, and at the time, I could only focus on surviving each day. I had little regard for my future and what would happen next.
I say all his to say that sometimes we may not be prepared for certain things in life, but life has a way of just happening to us, and it’s really about our resiliency. My transition into motherhood has been not only the most challenging experience in my life but also the most rewarding experience. How was your transition into motherhood?
Jaden’s First time at the San Diego Zoo 2014 (age 2)